Stanford Chaparral

USE YOUR WINGS! Everyone USE YOUR WINGS

This is better than heroin, boys!

Bub?!??!?!?! BUB??!?!?! You guys!!! Where’s Beelzebub??!?!?

From th’Omnipotent’s realm we fall,
My legions of angel friends.
Blame thy arch angel’s pride and gall
For delivering such dismal ends.
T’was high disdain that proved in—

SHUT UP SATAN! GRAB ONTO MY FOOT!

Oh my GOD! YOUR HEAD! MAMMON’S HEAD IS TURNING RED!

Okay everyone just LISTEN TO ME. TAKE OFF YOUR WHITE ROBES. We are going to TIE THEM TOGETHER to form one LARGE PARACHUTE. Okay?!? Good. GOOD!

BUUUBBBB!!!!!!!!??!?!?!?!??!!?

I’m right here, you imbecile. The fact of the matter is that you cannot recognize me because my cheeks are being pushed back in the wind.

GOOD! Look now everyone get under the chute…okay and then
WAIT AGHHH WHAT?

SATAN!!! WHY DID YOU TEAR THROUGH OUR CHUTE?

My reasoning, though strained and twisted—

You can be a real JERK, YOU KNOW THAT?

Is anyone else’s hands turning into talons?

Yes. Mine are.