Stanford Chaparral

"I took my old 486/DX 1 Pentium 180, popped the FSB channels off, clocked that puppy right through the moon. Now it's a bonafide OS X."

"This is might be more of an expert overclock hack, but I dropped my TI-83 onto an old broken lawnchair, and now you should see how quick the integrals run. 20% floating point efficiency improvement. But you have to be careful, because now the lawnchair divides by zero occasionally."

"I took the case off my old Mix 850 blender and found they were just using a simple twist pair. I shaved it down and switched the op jumper, and voila! No more margaritas and smoothies. Now I'm making pig iron."

"After Hansley came in second at the Regional Scottish Terrier Competition, I decided it was time to overclock. Unfortunately, the overclocked lifestyle went to his head. He overclocked his dog house; he upgraded his leash protocol. Now Hansley acts like he thinks he's better than all of our other overclocked appliances."

"Having achieved the world's first extinct animal cloning amusement park, we decided it was time to overclock the dinosaurs. Now the folly of man trying to control nature is even more apparent."

"I wanted to get the best out of my breakfast burrito, but I accidentally overclocked it, so I took out another one and was sure to clock it the right amount."

"I decided it was time to overclock my digestive system,. So that's why I became a vegetarian. As an added bonus, my self righteousness overclocked right through the roof."

"After several months of a fulfilling and exciting relationship, I decided it was time to overclock my girlfriend. Too bad my penis' PCI bus only goes 66 Mhz!"

"I mean, don't get me wrong, this overclocking thing sounds cool and all, but, I mean, I want to run things FASTER. Not differently."