Stanford Chaparral

At the Pony Store

Boy: I'm looking for a trick pony.

Man: Well here's a fine trick pony.

Boy: Let's see a trick.

Pony: [backflip]

Boy: Hmm. Any other tricks?

Pony: [backflip]

Boy: No, I already saw that trick. Are there any others?

Man: Umm, yeah, of course. [whispers to pony]

Pony: [backflip]

Boy: Look, if this is a one trick pony why don't you just say so?

Man: Alright, alright. How about this pony?

Boy: That's the same one.

Man: Nah it isn't. Watch this.

Pony: [backflip]

On the Street


Pony: ...

Youth: Hey I'm looking to party tonight. What's fifty bucks gonna get me.

Pony: ...

Youth: Alright alright, how 'bout a hundred.

Pony: ...

Youth: Ah, you're bustin' my balls here. Okay two. What do you say to two hundred?

Pony: [sensual backflip]

Youth: Yes, oh man. That was great. Whew. So do you do anything, you know, dirty?

Pony: [reluctant backflip]

At the Dinner Table


Pony: [half-assed backflip]

Son: Umm, right. Hey, Pete, could you please pass the peas instead?

Mom: So, how was your day at school, pony?

Pony: [dismissive backflip]

Dad: Look, I'm tired of this backflipping every time we ask you a question. I know how school went. I got a note from your teacher. Apparently you're flunking math.

Pony: [defensive backflip]

Dad: I'm serious. Do you want to end up a one trick pony working the second tier bar mitzvah circuit? What kind of life is that?

Son: Don't yell at him, Dad. Maybe he'd be doing better at school if you paid a little more attention to him.

Pony: [self-righteous backflip]

Dad: Who asked you! Go to your room.

At the Paste Factory


Pony: [tired backflip]

Worker: Oh my God. That pony just did a fucking back flip. Do another and we won't make you into paste.

Pony: [anxious backflip]

Worker: You know what, that's a great trick. I'll keep you anyway.

Pony: [excited backflips]

Boss: Hey Joe what the hell are you doing? Throw the pony in the vat already.

Worker: But boss this is a trick pony. It can do backflips.

Boss: Seriously? But can he do anything else?

Pony: [hopeless backflip]